The independent news organization of Duke University
Our breadsticks are for smart children. Not you.
Without the disease of students, the C1 buses have quickly become the country’s fifth largest nature reserve.
If there’s no Greek life, who’s gonna offer friendship and community? Y’know, other than friends and communities.
I’ve cornered him into every white man’s worst nightmare: a conversation about motorcycles that turns into a conversation about race politics.
Horny, repressed, zit-faced, socially inept, newly independent, fresh-out-of-high-school adolescents are exhibiting bad judgement. Administration is baffled.
As an expert reporter for The Chronicle, I’ve been assigned to hand in my pen, but I’m not ready to do that.
As an expert reporter for the Chronicle, I was assigned to write this stupid ass puff piece for my last satirical article as Monday Monday.
My RA swore I had to follow the dry campus policy, but I could smell the alcohol on their breath through the Oculus’s 5-sense features.
There’s a quote that I like from Luke Farrell’s Department Of Interview last year. Department Of asks him, “Fill in the blank: You know you’re a Duke student if...” He responds, “Uh, um, you pretend to be an extrovert.”
Perhaps the hardest part of this pandemic is surviving in quarantine. Toilet Paper is at an all-time low. Please consider using both Tar Heel Shirts and your old midterms to wipe your ass.
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