The Chronicle

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Evolution of a Dukie

(04/09/07 4:00am)

The origin of the Duke student is a highly debated one. Some argue that they climbed out half-blue, half-devil, from the primordial ooze of high school seniors. Others firmly debunk this theory of evolution and maintain that they came into being when God (or Christoph Guttentag) blinked. In a nod to the resurrection of Christ, we did wear our "Jesus is my homeboy" T-shirts all through Easter, but that is the only leeway we'll give to religious credo. Evolution it is.

https://www.dukechronicle.com/article/2007/04/evolution-dukie

All I got was this lousy T-shirt

(03/26/07 4:00am)

On Tuesday, a decree was put forth: Richard Wagoner, CEO of GM, shalt be thy Graduation Speaker. "Who?" we asked of the faceless "University officials" in charge of the decision. "He's the CEO of a MAJOR company that makes gas-guzzling vehicles, you know, like the Hummer. Oh, and he's also on our Board of Trustees," the voices answered back.

https://www.dukechronicle.com/article/2007/03/all-i-got-was-lousy-t-shirt

Postcards

(03/19/07 4:00am)

Dear Joyce,

https://www.dukechronicle.com/article/2007/03/postcards

Howdy, Partner!

(03/05/07 5:00am)

Sex seems to be a conversational taboo at Duke-relegated to banal congratulations, a lá "Dude I can't believe you hit that!"-or lectures in the cloisters of McClendon. Where are the animated reenactments of how awkward the wheelbarrow really is? Or the involved debates over the merits of the reverse cowgirl? (Pros: not as intimate; Cons: not as intimate). As for further proof of our hush-hush mentality about sex, why is the LGBT Center in the basement of the West Union?

https://www.dukechronicle.com/article/2007/03/howdy-partner

The best senior gift ever

(02/26/07 5:00am)

When faced with the grammatically sophisticated challenge of "Work hard, play well," like all good students we veni vidi vici-ed our way to the library. We planted our flag on the unrealized landscape of inebriated nerdiness and fully embraced this new mantra.

https://www.dukechronicle.com/article/2007/02/best-senior-gift-ever

Duke monster trucks it out

(02/19/07 5:00am)

Hopped up on diesel fumes from a fierce Monster Truck Jam, James and Joyce visited the fan-site Gravedigger.com and won the chance to host our own Monster Truck Jam. What's not to like about trucks with 540cc engines crushing cars under their giant wheels of vengeance? Here's how we see Duke Monster Trucking it out:

https://www.dukechronicle.com/article/2007/02/duke-monster-trucks-it-out

J & J get personal

(02/12/07 5:00am)

This weekend we were sitting at home in our pajamas, gorging on potatoes and cheese, and lamenting the lack of Bollywood romance in our lives. Why can't my one true love follow me across three continents and stop my wedding to an evil man? Where's the ballad to accompany my ride on the C-1? And where's my dream sequence in Switzerland? Instead, we're left with dating tragedies that rival the sinking of the Titanic.

https://www.dukechronicle.com/article/2007/02/j-j-get-personal

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