My hopes and dreams
(11/29/06 5:00am)
Last week while I was back home for Thanksgiving I made an interesting discovery.
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Last week while I was back home for Thanksgiving I made an interesting discovery.
As I'm sure you've already noticed from my picture, I'm not so tough on the eyes. Hell, I might as well just come out and say it: I'm devastatingly attractive-there's just no way around it.
As we all know, the average Duke student is a very hateful person. I think it's safe to say that the vast majority of students here have a pretty strong hatred for things like dogs, children, firefighters, the city of Durham, etc.
There are a lot of things at this great institution of learning that confuse me. I'm confused by the labyrinthine design of the Edens dorms. I'm confused by the Great Hall's decision to open when everybody goes to class and close when they get out. I'm confused about how this campus has managed to breed squirrels that seem to be completely fearless.
The other day I came home to my beautiful Central Campus apartment to find that my toilet had backed up and was nearly completely full with mystery feces.
If you are ever lucky enough find yourself in northern South Carolina in the early part of May, you might just have the privilege of witnessing one of nature's strangest phenomenons-the annual migration of Duke students from their native Durham, North Carolina, to the warm breeding-grounds of Myrtle Beach, South Carolina.
As we all know, Duke has been going through a pretty rough stretch recently. What with the lacrosse controversy, protests, negative media coverage, dragons, drive-by shootings and Duke parking, the last couple of weeks have been anything but positive.
It's just about here-springtime at Duke. In most places spring is a time for rebirth, rejuvenation, and of course some hot squirrel-on-squirrel action. But Durham typically does spring a little differently than most.
When I first came to this school, I had it all figured out. I was riding high. I had just aced my GED test and then had been accepted into Duke (if the admissions office asks, I'm an Eskimo from North Carolina whose parents both went to Duke).