In an act illustrating exactly why Duke ranked so high on GQ's list of America's Douchiest Colleges, what we can only imagine to be a group of Duke students has issued an online petition against the Conde Nast publication's for its "biased selection process." It says:
We, the undersigned members of the Duke University community, demand the following:- More transparency in GQ's douchiest school selection process.
- More rigor in the aforementioned process, reflecting the rigor in Duke University's renowned douche-nurturing environment.
- An explanation of why Duke could win numerous honorable mentions in diverse categories of douchiness, reflecting the world-class breadth and depth of Duke's douchetastic excellence, yet still only earn second place.
- A ranking correction. Duke University must be selected for first place to reflect the reality of Duke all-surpassing performance in fine douche education.
- Free dry cleaning for my Polo shirts, brah. Don't you know who my dad is?
Douchiest (if funny) indeed.
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