COBB COUNTY, Ga. - With a home game this week, the grid pickers finally got a chance to catch up on their sleep. Unfortunately, all the commotion behind Newt Gingrich's resignation was causing nightmares.
However, "Muhammad" Al Lee was not very in tune with the latest goings on in the political world. Off in his dream world he still thought his Buffalo Bills could win the Super Bowl with a midget at quarterback. He woke up screaming "wide right, wide right!!!!"
Although Brian "Sugar" Kane awoke in a horrendous sweat speaking unintelligibly, we managed to make out something about Hollywood Hogan and Stone Cold Steve Austin dying in a humongous crash coming around the tight turn four at Talladega.
Barrett "Norm" Peterson dreamt in a world without religion. "How could I ever talk to any celebrities or sports stars? I'm just not that cool without my Mormon title," Peterson was heard muttering.
Neal Morgan "Stanley Dean Witter" woke up screaming "Charleeeeeeene! Where are you, my love?" Morgan would get no digs about his social life this week.
Rach "el mariachi" Cohen, who was choking badly in the grid picks contest, much like what her beloved Red Sox and New England Patriots do every season, was trapped in a post-apocalyptic world where only she and Nomar Garciaparra were left alive. He swore to a life of celibacy and let the human race end.
Joel Israel"-ly really muscular" dreamt that after leaving four years of being locked in Gold's Gym, he was still his scrawny little self. "I can now bench 105!!!" he was heard exclaiming to Rolly.
Zach Davis "Love III" was found in Bellevue Mental Hospital strapped in a straight jacket, incessantly humming Grammy Award Winning LeAnne Rimes' "How Can I Live Without You?" "She dumped me," he screamed as he was taken away to his electroshock therapy.
Dave "German" Schepard awoke in a daze. "I went through a whole week without annoying anybody. I felt... so empty."
Yvonne "Up, up and" Krjwyj dreamt that she had to be in goal for the Stars without any equipment against her beloved Red Wings. "They all just started laughing at me," she shouted, "Even though I made 37 saves to record the shutout. I wonder what they thought was so funny."
Adam Gan "zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz" told us all about his nightmare. "I was wrestling in a steel-cage death match with Taymon Domzalski. I'm lucky I didn't die. He's not even in my weight class."
Nick Tylwalk "-in' on sunshine"s hair kept growing and growing and growing and growing until he had an afro like Dr. J in the old-school days. "Hey guys, I guess I need some soul glow now. Get me Eriq LaSalle on the phone!"
"If ya want my body" Anya "think I'm sexy" Sostek dreamt that the entire field hockey team was in Maryland when Saddam Hussein nuked it. "What would I ever do with my life without field hockey or Maryland sports?"
Adam "I've got a big" Winer was a late insert to the section, yet somehow stunned that this was the first time all year that Chronicle readers had seen his name.
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