So where is God, really?

Based on the religious festivals that have been going on with Yom Kippur, the pilgrimage of Hajj and Eid ul Adha, it is safe to believe that the remembrance of God has been somewhat more prevalent on Duke’s campus and throughout this world during this past week. This is not to say that religious folks aren’t always cognizant of God’s presence, but for some of us folks who are less religious, festivals become a time to remember God, think of the things we are grateful for and celebrate amidst friends and family.

Times like these are often good for reflection and introspection. Most of us think of self-improvement, pray for friends and family and for those that are suffering across the world. Yet, some of us, concerned with the myriad of injustices, the copious amounts of pain that innocent individuals are subjected to and the various evils that plague society, question God’s existence. Of course, there are some who don’t believe in God entirely, and I am certainly not arguing that one ought to, but for others who are somewhere “in between,” the perpetrated evils across the world become a cause of immense concern about God’s existence and role in society.

It doesn’t take much to discern the various things that are wrong with the world today. Beyond Duke’s campus, which is a bubble of privilege, Durham suffers from a homelessness problem. Throughout Durham and the rest of the United States, there are various health, racial, ethnic, gender and socioeconomic disparities. Black women of any income level and education are more likely than white women to experience chronic stress that results in the birth of premature babies. Throughout American history there has been little political effort made to reduce social injustices in public health and income inequality. The majority of the wealth of the United States is concentrated amongst the top 20 percent of American society. Beyond the United States, the developing world is facing a myriad of problems and injustices. While food is often thrown away on a massive scale in the United States, 805 million people or one in nine individuals living in this world are undernourished. Of those not plagued by hunger, many innocent people live in danger, scared for their lives and the lives of their children. Extremist Islamic groups are a continuous threat to those individuals living in the Middle East that are unaffiliated with the terrorist groups. Assad’s regime as well as other corrupt regimes in countries throughout the Muslim world terrorize, torture and cruelly murder innocent people throughout their countries and beyond. In fact, the Syrian refugees form the second largest exodus of people after World War II and the Holocaust. I could perhaps go on and on, but I think that my point is clear: the world is an unjust place, and often times a few corrupt psychopaths can engender millions of innocent deaths and massive damage that permanently scars all of humanity.

Why are such injustices perpetrated and such evil pervasive? Why are humans endowed with so much free will? Free will that scars, free will that cheats, free will that steals, free will that tortures and free will that kills. Why do disparities exist based on where we are born, which family we are born into and which racial or ethnic group we are members of? And amidst the atrocities that are prevalent, what is God doing? Is there even a God? And if so, where is God, really? These questions are complex, frustrating and force me to reflect upon my own privilege as a student at Duke.

Personally, I am often frustrated with the privilege that I have been blessed with. I mean, I am nowhere near special. I am sure that I don’t work half as hard as the children that are born on the streets in the developing world that struggle to find food on a daily basis. I am often ignorant and stupid. I generally complain about first-world problems such as my struggle with the amount of work I have, the lack of time I get to hang out with my friends and my self-image (how beautiful I feel, how fat I am and whatever being “successful” means). This is not to say that my problems are irrelevant, diminished or unjustified amidst the scope of the problems that are pervasive across the world. It is, however, helpful when I contextualize my own problems within the problems that exist around the world, and that allows me to be thankful for my own opportunities.

I see the privileges that I have been bestowed with as a trial in disguise. And for me, God is there somewhere, testing me to see not only how I utilize the privilege I have but also what I choose to do about the adversities I see. I see my privileges as an opportunity to help those that are in dire need. I see my privilege as a way to give back to my community. What I do with my privilege is what is important to me. How much I enjoy that privilege, however, through buying luxuries is irrelevant and futile. There are numerous problems to solve in this world, too much to do, too much to exterminate and too much to ponder upon for me to waste any of my time. Most importantly, though, there is a lot to love. You see, I find God where I find love—love for the poor, love for friends and family, love for the weak, love for the oppressed, love for the needy and love for the entire community.

I know that atrocities will occur time and time again. I know that more people will die unjustly, millions of people will die of hunger while others enjoy terribly lavish lives and injustices will tear the fabric of common humanity. Yet, I believe that at the core of every human being lies the capacity to love. That capacity to love is where I find my God, my purpose to live and my purpose to change my surroundings, regardless of how small, trivial and irrelevant that change may seem to be.

Maryam Ali is a Trinity sophomore. Her column runs on alternate Fridays.