The "F" word

Crazy. Radical. Feminazis. These are all words my family used to describe the work that I do for Duke’s Women’s Center. “Feminists are a bunch of angry women who hate men because they aren’t able to find any for themselves” was one of many arguments my family threw into the discussion. They aren’t the only people holding these sentiments, however. The vitriolic reaction often received stems, I think, from a gross misinterpretation of the word “feminism.” Simply put, “feminism” is the advocating of political, social and economic equality for women and men. Yet, in discussions of equality when the term “feminist” arises, I’m met with shock and disgust at the mere mention of that horrid word. God forbid people embrace a title that embodies equality for women. The connotation of the word “feminist” and any related matter have become a sort of taboo.

People rarely think of men when they think of what a feminist looks like. I, however, am both a straight male and a feminist. Feminists are not angry women who hate men. Feminists are ordinary people who believe in gender equality, and most people are feminists without even knowing it. But for some reason, claiming the identity of feminist provokes a venomous backlash. I am often met with people questioning my masculinity simply because I call myself a feminist.

In our culture, what are known as micro-aggressions are often used amongst friends as jokes. This is especially true in male groups in talking about “getting butt” at Shooters or calling a woman a “slam piece.” These micro-aggressions, although meant to be harmless and playful, actually foster the exertion of male dominance over women. When I refuse to rate women numerically based on their superficial appearances, I am often met with some pushback and curiosity. While I understand that the intention of my friends is to have fun, what they don’t realize is the privilege that we, as males, receive. Something as seemingly innocent as rating women based on their looks reflects our lack of understanding of the pressure that women face in order to feel approved of by men and by the rest of society. In order to deconstruct the gender roles that we, as a society, have created, the privileged need to become aware of the privileges that they have in order to allow room for empathy. Respect forms the basis of any relationship, and if we’re so quick to disrespect some women, we’re really disrespecting all women.

We are often told to “be the change you want to see in the world.” Refusing to use demeaning language is an incredibly small step that people, especially men, can take in the pursuit of a more equal world. By setting an example for peers, people in the movement for gender equality can inspire others to take the same pledge to deconstruct the gender roles that we, as a society, have created. This chain reaction will ultimately increase awareness and leadership in the movement, helping eliminate the misconceptions about what it truly means to be a feminist. The role of obtaining equality for women does not fall solely on women. Rather, it is everyone’s responsibility to provide everyone equal opportunities, regardless of gender identity.

Though my track and field team and friends are supportive of the work I do for the center, many of them, despite agreeing with the goals of equality, still refuse to be associated with what they see as the “crazy feminists.” While it is true that there are some radical feminists in the movement for gender equality, they certainly do not make up the majority or even a substantial number. Every movement has an extreme wing, yet we don’t ask all Christians to apologize for the Westboro Baptist Church nor do we assume all Christians believe in the principles that Westboro espouses. The existence of people who misconstrue an idea does not mean we need to jettison the idea entirely.

Feminism is not a dirty word. The feminist movement is about equality, not female takeover. An equal world is an environment in which people, male or female or anything in between, can actively chart their own destinies, whether that is climbing the corporate ladder or staying home to raise a family. It is a world in which gender stereotypes do not determine a person’s future.

In order to reach this future, we need more people claiming the title of feminist, especially men. Men are the largest perpetrators of violence against women. Charting a more equal future depends on more allies, more people claiming the feminist title. There is a plethora of resources that people can use in order to educate themselves on how to become an ally, how to help and how to stand against gender violence. If you believe in a just cause, don’t be afraid to embrace the title that comes with it.

This is the first column in a semester-long series written by the Women’s Center interns. Their column explores gender issues and runs on alternate Fridays. Jordan Burton, a Trinity sophomore, wrote this week’s column.