Durham celebrates first same-sex marriages

Last month, Randy Cahoon and Russell Tingle decided they had waited for marriage long enough. After 33 years together, the Durham couple planned to wed in Washington, D.C., which has allowed same-sex marriages since 2009.

At the last minute, however, the pair changed their minds—deciding that they would wait until same-sex marriage was legal in their home state of North Carolina.

"We thought it would be a long wait," Cahoon said with a smile. "But it was only a month."

"We wanted to do it now, before anyone in the legislature somehow changed their mind." —Randy Cahoon

Cahoon and Tingle were among the first same-sex couples to be married in Durham County, holding a small ceremony on the Old Courthouse steps just after receiving their marriage license. They were one of more than a dozen couples who wed in the courthouse Monday—the first full day that North Carolina issued same-sex marriage licenses.

After a federal judge struck down Amendment One—the state's gay marriage ban—late Friday afternoon, same-sex marriages officially became legal in North Carolina. The move sparked celebration across the state, more than two years after Amendment One defined marriage as being between a man and a woman.

The ruling followed a decision issued in July by the U.S. Fourth Circuit Court of Appeals, stating that Virginia's gay marriage ban was unconstitutional—meaning that the same would hold for the gay marriage bans of other states in the fourth circuit, including North Carolina, South Carolina and West Virginia. The Supreme Court declined to review the case last week, opening the door for specific cases across the circuit to officially strike down the states' respective laws against same-sex marriage.

In North Carolina, Amendment One was officially struck down just after 5:30 p.m. Friday. The first same-sex marriage licenses in the state were offered that evening, but most counties—including Durham—had already closed their register of deeds office for the weekend and began offering licenses Monday morning.

Right from the start, the Durham office was busy processing license applications—and watching the weddings of couples who simply did not want to wait any longer, said Register of Deeds Willie Covington.

"It was real busy this morning," Covington said. "There was a crowd waiting for us."

On a typical day, the office grants between 12 and 15 marriage licenses. Monday, Covington estimated that the office granted at least 50.

Many couples obtained their marriage licenses Monday with plans for a formal wedding in the future, but more than a dozen chose to get married right away.

"The biggest reason we did it fast was because of the kids," said Christy Moore, who has two children with her partner, Kathleen Moore.

"I've been working on this fight for 35 years, in the church and in the community." —Jeanette Stokes

The two have been together for a decade and had a formal commitment ceremony six years ago, but marriage offered a chance to make legal matters—such as parenthood and owning a house together—less complicated, Christy Moore said.

For others, the decision for a Monday wedding was an opportunity to seize marriage right away, in the event that the decision was reversed.

"We wanted to do it now, before anyone in the legislature somehow changed their mind," Cahoon explained.

He and Tingle dressed in matching yellow shirts, holding yellow flowers as they were married by Presbyterian minister Jeanette Stokes outside the courthouse.

Stokes was one of several local clergy who came to the courthouse to perform weddings for any couple who was interested.

"A Presbyterian minister, my mother will be so happy," Cahoon joked.

For Stokes, officiating the marriages were truly a labor of love—a chance to finally perform legal marriages for same-sex couples, decades after she began officiating same-sex commitment ceremonies.

"I've been working on this fight for 35 years, in the church and in the community," Stokes said. "It's just tremendous."

Although there were reports of protestors outside some county courthouses across the state—and in at least one case in Pasquotank County, a magistrate refused to perform a civil ceremony for a same-sex couple—the scene in downtown Durham was largely a joyous one. Couples celebrated each other's weddings, with passersby stopping to watch and cheer.

"It's just such a great group of people," Tingle said.

Logistically, the day was somewhat of a challenge, Covington said—with the register of deeds receiving its first gender-neutral license forms late Sunday night, and no distinct guidelines for how to proceed under the new ruling. But there were no major issues and all in all, the day was a happy one, he said.

"I really think it went well," Covington said. "It's been a good day."

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