A dose of perspective

“Readin’ all the front pages/Readin’ all the back pages/Gotta make my mind up/Which column can I read?/

It’s Monday, Monday/Read the paper on Monday/Everyone usually just does the crossword, crossword/Monday, Monday/Why’s there just one Monday?/Everybody’s trynna catch that Gothic Squirrel.”

Looking for a celebration three days ago, I crawled into the Craven computer lab while someone was listening to this awful song with an imminently catchy tune. (I may have taken artistic liberties in reproducing the lyrics.) The actual title informed me that the William Hung-esque attempt at fame was excreted by none other than Rebecca Black in her new-ish single, “Friday”—a video for which had more than 27 million views on YouTube. To put that in perspective, Justin Bieber, who she has consistently been compared to, had 490 million views for his equally awful song, “Baby,” the last time I snuck into the lab.

Due to the fact I am constantly surrounded by humans almost 10 times my size, I try to understand different frames of reference all of the time. Because of this, I can understand why things that are catastrophic to me, like rain and falling acorns, are relatively minor to you. I would have thought that since Duke students could usually understand what 27 million views means in terms of YouTube video epic-ness, they would surely have some level of perspective in other walks of life, but my observations of reactions to a few current events have put this assumption into question.

I enjoyed hearing the pseudo-intellectual frat stars of main quad discussing the recent lockout of the NFL. Though slightly distracted by their pastel clothing, sips of Natural Light (whose name more closely describes how plants grow than any aspect of a beverage) and rounds of cornhole, I heard that the NFL players and owners could not figure out how to properly split up $9 billion. I had a hard time grasping exactly what they were saying because I really don’t know how much money that is. Quick: Think of something you have that costs $9 billion. What about something that costs $9 million? $9,000 is probably pretty relatable, roughly the price of a used human car or 20 percent of a student’s yearly tuition. Now consider that $9 million is about what Duke takes in from one class’s yearly fees. As there are four classes paying each year, that means these NFL people can’t split up an amount equivalent to each student paying their fees in full... for 250 years.

So when you pick up a paper and read that these bozos are haggling over that much money, it is rather disingenuous to read that article without juxtaposing it with a more comparable number. Despite the fact that 250 seems more manageable than 9 billion, the fact remains that almost nobody on Duke’s campus can understand what it means for Duke to take in that much money. Let’s not even get started on the U.S.-China trade deficit of $252 billion.

On the flip side, the tsunami/earthquake/nuclear fiasco is just as detached for someone in the U.S. for a completely different reason. Financial damages aside, some students don’t understand the sheer magnitude of this quake. It measured as a 9.0 magnitude quake, but what does 9.0 mean? I’m sure you heard about the Haiti earthquake, which was a 7.0. According to complicated squirrel formulas that calculate energy released, Japan’s quake had 1,000 times more energy than Haiti’s. Go ahead and text “Japan” to 80888 to make a $10 donation if you think 1,000 is a big number.

So you can figure out that for proper context, you need a comparison to something else relevant and an understanding of the metric used. You should try out these ideas for March Madness, too. See that Kyrie led Duke with 14 points in his first game, then think about the opponent. Then point out on a U.S. map where that university is located.