Steamy in the 'Stock? So passe.

Yawned your way through scaling Baldwin, driving around the circle backward and "tunneling?" Try discerning TV editor Molly McGarrett's list of souped-up stunts-guaranteed to make memories (and maybe the crime log.)

Streaking the Plaza

After all, the Plaza's motto is "Where Good Things Happen." You know that you'd like nothing better than to see your bashful buddies finally make good on those back logs of naked runs that their poor Beirut showings have earned them. Not up for flaunting your own goodies? I recommend a dark night, a quick step and a heavy dose of liquid courage.

A- Sure, everyone loves a good streaker, but we all know that some birthday suits are best left in the closet.

Sex in K-Ville Tents

My guess is that a fair number of Crazies have already fulfilled this one. Nothing beats some good ol' fashioned bodyheat for staving off that winter cold (as if Duke students really need any excuse at all to get it on). This is no late-night, dorm-room nookie, though, so beware the many obstacles that stand in your way. Nothing says buzzkill like tentmates, blue paint and mud puddles.

A All I can say is, if the tent's a rockin', don't come a knockin'.

Spaying/Neutering a Feral Campus Cat

Alright, so it might be my own solution to a personal pet peeve, but this could be the first grad requirement that actually produces a positive result for the school. Now I'm no veterinarian, but I'm betting that a little contraception could go a long way among our feline friends. It's the same logic as Student Health offering students free condoms. Well, sort of.

C There are probably a whole host of animal rights and safety issues that this plan violates-but hey, it's a step in the right direction.

Having a Drunken Conversation with President Brodhead at a DUU Event

Everybody has a complaint to get off his or her chest, be it the one-stall women's bathroom outside of Alpine Bagels, the ever-present "Event Parking" signs at the Bryan Center deck or the elusive nature of those Safe Rides vans. Here's the time to bring up those negligible annoyances without that irritating mental filter. And hey, you never know-he just might take you up on that idea for a moveable walkway to the Blue Zone.

B You just know that one belligerent rambler will get these classy soirees canceled.

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