The unbearable weight of the upcoming Career Fair is almost crushing. In two weeks, our future could be determined by a witty remark or a sterling first impression to our future employer. It is almost enough to make you start studying for the LSAT.
Because let's face it, for every person who has actually wanted to be a lawyer (instead of, say, a space cowboy or an astronaut) since they were little, there's another person who just decided he didn't know what else to do with himself, didn't like the uncertainty of the job search and was pretty sure he could pass a test, write some applications and get into a good school, because, hey, he'd done that before.
For the rest of us, a scary future awaits. It is a future of subservience to senior employees, of menial task-performing, cold-calling, memo-composing drudgery.
I am sure I'm being pessimistic, but after a summer spent working nine-hour days pro bono, essentially copying, pasting and formatting e--mails, I think I've earned the right to dread the adult world. As the old graduation joke goes, I have seen the future, and all I can say is, don't go!
But, taking it for granted that there are probably some years at the bottom rung ahead of us, another scary thought looms: Where should we go? Marianne Williamson claimed that our deepest fear is not that we are weak but that we are powerful beyond measure. My fear is that I have no idea where my power might lie.
I will never be a physicist. I have simply missed too many of the fundamental classes, and just gone in the other direction completely. Yet I never received any indication that I am not a brilliant physicist. My physics record from high school and the AP test is nearly flawless. What if I could have been a world-renowned physicist? That door is probably already shut.
Instead I headed toward the liberal arts for no apparent reason. I think that I wanted to be a writer, which now seems almost as unrealistic as being a space cowboy. All I really know is that I do not want to be a walking, unemployed cliche-a waiter with an English degree, just waiting till he finishes his novel and his life really takes off. Unfortunately, that is probably also my most likely future.
Other than that, it seems pretty hard to know where to go looking for a job. I don't think I am interested in I-banking, but I don't really know what I-banking is. I know that lots of Duke graduates do it, and that people make a lot of money doing it for long hours. Somehow these facts have combined to make it unattractive.
Consulting is another common field that I'm not sure about. I mean, I guess I could consult with people, but I'm not sure who I would be consulting with, or what we would consult about, or what authority I have to consult with anyone. I would lump the generic business as another area in which I have no idea what I would be doing.
And of course in addition to those obvious options, a wide world of other possibilities is out there, or so I'm told. What those might be, other than civil service and more schooling, eludes me. The prospect of dedicating my life to some worthy cause is certainly enticing, but I have no skill to bring to the less fortunate around the world, other than perhaps reading to them in a language they don't understand.
High hopes amidst pessimism carry me to the Career Fair, where my destiny could, theoretically, possibly, be revealed. The best I can do is be prepared for anything. I'm not going to figure my future out today, but I have found some helpful guidance for the coming years in an unlikely place, a John Cusack movie:
"I don't want to sell anything, buy anything, or process anything as a career. I don't want to sell anything bought or processed, or buy anything sold or processed, or process anything sold, bought, or processed, or repair anything sold, bought, or processed. You know, as a career, I don't want to do that."
Jordan Everson is a Trinity senior. His column runs every Wednesday.
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