One night last year, I had an interesting experience while trying to help out one homeless man in Durham. As I walked out of Cosmic Cantina, he called out to me and my friend to ask for some money. While my friend did not have any, I did, but I offered the homeless man a meal instead. He gladly accepted.
Everyone who has ventured into Durham has seen the city's homeless. While as a prospective student I was never informed of their prevalence here, my first encounter with a homeless man made their presence immediately apparent to me.
I had never before faced this scenario alone. No one back home or here at Duke had bothered to give me simple, sound advice on how to respond to panhandlers, and without anyone to guide me, I learned the answers to these questions the hard way.
Once inside Cosmic, the homeless man, whom I will call "Reggie," began to bombard me with some of the stories he had probably practiced for weeks.
"You know, this is the first time I've ever been in here, so you're gonna have to tell me what to get," he said. Meanwhile, someone in the background yelled, "Reggie, you always in here!"
I laughed and then suggested he get the steak quesadilla with chips and salsa. He agreed but added that two Coronas to wash it down would sure hit the spot.
Two Coronas, it was.
After ordering, we sat down, and Reggie began to tell me a little about himself. It just so happened to be his birthday. He had not eaten in days, showered in weeks or seen a toothbrush in months. His entire family died of lupus, and because of this he could not earn enough money to keep his apartment. After losing his job, Reggie took to the streets, which were extremely horrible. When finished, he added, "By the way, could you tell me about finding Jesus?"
"Well," I began, but it was too late. The food had arrived, and Reggie dove straight into the quesadilla and chips. After taking a bite out of the quesadilla, he grimaced and said, "Ugh! This is too doughy."
He then snapped into a chip and exclaimed, "And these are too salty!" Reggie shoved all the food aside and chugged his two beers. I couldn't believe it.
Apparently beggars can be choosers.
Everything became clear when Reggie asked me for some cash to stay in a shelter that night. I said no, but he managed to get six dollars from some of my gullible friends who dropped by the table to say hello. But I, too, had been tricked, for he had used me to get money for a purpose that was most likely not staying in a shelter for the evening.
This episode was depressing, but it taught me an important lesson: Be careful whenever trying to be charitable to the homeless. It is a general rule that handing out cash is a bad idea, as it may be used for drugs, alcohol or women. There are shelters available, and only in rare cases do they charge a fee, so do not believe a person who claims he needs money for a place to stay. Instead of giving cash, then, offer to buy a meal-but skip the beer.
If you are not really in the giving mood, which is understandable for a student on a budget, a short conversation or simple hello as you walk by can probably make a difference in a homeless person's day. I have friends who believe that ignoring someone completely is the best way to go because looking at his face gives him false hope.
But I tend to disagree. It is lonely on the streets, and treating someone like an actual human being is always a good idea.
If you can, either give your time to help the homeless or make a donation to an organization that knows how to assist those who are actually in need. Urban Ministries of Durham, for example, offers shelter to around 130 people a night. If not them, then look for other opportunities in Durham or back home.
What students need to keep in mind, however, is that giving out money to random people on the street is never a good idea. It can sometimes help dishonest con-artists or even perpetuate destructive behavior. Handing cash to panhandlers damages both the city and its homeless population.
Jamie Deal is a Trinity sophomore. His column runs every other Thursday.
Get The Chronicle straight to your inbox
Signup for our weekly newsletter. Cancel at any time.