We present this report not only with the aim of improving the climate for women at Duke, but also to improve the experience for all who work or study here."
Thus begins a statement from Susan Roth, chair of the Women's Initiative's executive committee. I found it online at the Women's Initiative website--a group of pages refreshingly free from floral imagery or Emily Dickinson quotes. I originally read the Women's Initiative report with a wary eye, expecting the usual rhetoric and empty recommendations. But, that particular sentence gave me a bit of hope in Duke's willingness to make some decisions. I also hope that some other people would see it, and perhaps realize that positive changes for women can and generally are positive changes for everyone. Since the Women's Initiative released its report, I've heard a few comments along the lines of, "Men are half this campus too," and, "Where's the Men's Initiative?" I've brushed them off. Men, I love you, but if you don't see why we need a Women's Initiative, take a closer look at your female friends. If you still don't see it, look at yourself.
Mostly what I've heard, though, has been silence. Perhaps this is because I'm part of the undergraduate community, which hasn't yet felt many of the recommendations' effects. In case you've forgotten (or never knew) what those recommendations are, Duke has a convenient chart outlining its "action items." In the undergraduate agenda are efforts to more closely examine the Greek system, the dating culture, sexual assault prevention, women's health, eating disorder education and academic advising. Maybe the silence is because we just don't care. The men don't find the issue interesting, and the women aren't supposed to.
None of the report's findings on the undergraduate body surprise me. What I find jarring is that Duke needed a year-long study to find what seems to be common knowledge: that Duke women feel pressure to be "effortlessly perfect"-- physically, academically and socially. The New York Times presented this Women's Initiative finding as breaking news. It's not. I suppose I had undue hope in what the Women's Initiative would bring--immediate change, or an end to the greek system or some pat solution to everything over which we could all hold hands and sing "We Are the World." In retrospect, it was a pretty stupid hope.
So how about this "effortless perfection?" I like the phrase but I'm not sure of its accuracy. The most perfect girls I know--the ones with the 3.8s and steely calves and shiny hair who spend their summers saving the world, one AIDS baby at a time--they betray very clearly how hard they work, whether with their tired eyes or their constant rush. I don't think people think less of them for their effort; I think they wish they'd get more sleep. I'm getting tired of the Duke girl's stereotype, carrying a two-tone tote bag, wearing gym clothes and eating salad by day and ice cream by night. Yes, these girls exist here, but there are other girls, too.
One report finding mentioned that Duke women seeking entertainment in a nonsuperficial environment, meaning a place where she needn't wear the absolutely right clothes or hide her intelligence, remove themselves from the mainstream, whether they want to or not. Freshmen, wait until after rush before you decide whether to agree with this. As someone who came to Duke despite the Greek system, not because of it, I remember my relief freshman fall that it wasn't terribly pervasive, and my dismay second semester on learning that it isn't pervasive until rush. The report says straight out that fraternities and sororities help enforce those norms of cuteness. It forces me to question why the University supports a Greek system at all. Greek life may be on its way out, but anything with that much space in the Bryan Center isn't exactly floundering with the administration.
I resent that the greek system has such a strong hold on social life, when there are so many other options. I don't think it's the allure of pledging that draws men into fraternities, or the distilled cuteness of paint pens that get women into sororities. Enough people rush "to meet people" to make me think they haven't really tried to find them elsewhere. I don't mean to be too hard on those involved with greek life, but what have you gotten out of it that you couldn't have found elsewhere? Maybe a lot--I don't know; I'm an outsider. I suppose I find it too obvious that I'm an outsider to see a lot of worth in something so exclusive.
The report says both men and women wish Duke had a stronger dating scene, and rightly points out that "it is incumbent on the students to make those changes." That's true. Do we want to? Asking someone on a date isn't hard; you might even have fun, but if it's just a hookup you're after, you might as well go to a party. I don't think the latter option particularly appealing, but enough of us engage in it with gusto for it to be a viable option. Maybe it's a question of fear. When someone pushes you away on the dance floor you can chalk it up to the beer, but if someone declines the pleasure of your company for an evening, it hits a little closer to home. Rejection equals non-perfection, and non-perfection is something we should all avoid, right? Especially we Duke girls.
Meghan Valerio is a Trinity senior. Her column appears every other Monday.
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