Simone says not so hot

Here's a shocker: Popular icons may be more invention than individual; at times they aren't real at all. Sorry to ruin Simone's punchline for you, but you've already seen it all in the trailer and seen it for yourself enough times outside of the cineplex.

While reiterating this theme already so fixed in our minds, Simone writer/producer/director Andrew Niccol (The Truman Show, Gattaca) earns few points for originality here. Simone, however, takes the pretense of classic fake-brought-to-life tales such as Pinocchio and last year's AI: Artificial Intelligence a step further by showing how we can manufacture celebrities by literally creating the world's most famous icon out of computer pixels.

Simone, deemed a "synthespian" by the downtrodden programmer (Elias Koteas) who created her, is a blonde goddess born out of computer code that mixes and matches features of Hollywood's all-time greatest beauties. Think: a little Audrey here, a little Sophia there. However, unlike those she was programmed to emulate who basked in the paparazzi glow, Simone's greatest allure is her complete lack of availability for photo opportunities and interviews--a gag rehashed over and over again in a fit of dramatic irony that grows real old, real quick.

Yes, appearances can be deceiving. Model/actress Rachel Roberts looks gorgeous in the role of the animated Simone. And while one would think Al Pacino's lead performance would carry such a film, it doesn't. Even the movie that piqued my interest from the preview and lost my interest by the ending credits succeeds in proving that films--much like their stars--are sometimes not as wonderful as they may appear.