If you thought seeing Eminem kickin' it with Elton John on the Grammys was weird, don't worry-wayward record executives and clueless musicians have cobbled together unsuspected pairings for years, almost always to horrific results.
Take the soundtrack to the 1993 film Judgment Night, for example. The concept was collaborations between rock and hip-hop-not such a bad idea considering the glut of such material nowadays. Although the Slayer and Ice-T combo went well, pairings like Sonic Youth with Cypress Hill and Dinosaur Jr. with Del Tha Funky Homosapien left people scratching their heads. As for Faith No More teamed up with Boo-Ya T.R.I.B.E.-well, we'll leave that one to the ages.
Along with last week's homosexual/homophobe combo, we hear that guitarist Jim Ward of hardcore up-and-comers At the Drive-In is recording a collaboration with bassist Guy Berryman of Coldplay-on a country album.
So, in our usual creative spirit, Recess though we would suggest a few other unlikely pairings that might rock the world's socks off:
Pair: Youthful country star Aaron Carter and actor Gary Coleman
Performance: Chippendale show
Gag Factor: 6. Hey, at least Carter's cute.
Pair: Kid Rock and Tony Bennett
Performance: Drum n' bass record
Gag Factor: 2. Though it plays to none of their purported strengths, it doesn't seem to exploit their weaknesses either.
Pair: Moby and Rage Against the Machine
Performance: Car commercial
Gag Factor: 9. The soul-selling of the vegan vagabond was sickening enough, but the add-on of RATM would be enough to call out Students Against Sweatshops.
Pair: Ricky Martin and Tom Cruise
Performance: Moving love ballad
Gag Factor: 5. Would all but confirm the truth about this ambiguously gay duo, and break the hearts of women everywhere.
Pair: Smut Peddlers and D.C. Talk
Performance: Interpretive dance
Gag Factor: 10. White rappers with a dwarf along with Christian rappers, all dancing? Sounds like one more business crackers should stay out of.
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