Interview With Jake Johannsen

Recess Editor Jonas Blank caught up with comedian Jake Johannsen last week before his show to talk about life as a comedian, the Dubya, the role of alcohol in comedy and making fun of blind people. Is anything off limits to a veteran comedian? Just don't put Chelsea Clinton on amihotornot.com anytime soon....

How is a comedy club atmosphere different from watching comedy on TV?

Well, I think it's like the difference between watching porno and having sex. When you watch it on TV, you're watching a comic make an audience laugh. And you laugh, too, a little bit, but you're not as involved. When you go see it live, you're directly involved. I think people aren't always aware of that because they see it on T.V. and it's funny and they think, 'Oh this guy's funny,' but when you're in the room, that guy is really there, and he's really talking to you.... Have you seen a lot of comedy before?

How do you like Charlie Goodnight's? Have you ever appeared there before?

I've been there quite a few times. It's a really great club; I would say as far as nationwide, it's very respected among comedians.

What makes a club good or bad? What's a particularly bad one you've been to?

What makes it bad is if it's rowdy and the management

doesn't get people to respect the show and be quiet and watch the show-then it's just crazy mayhem.

You seem to have kind of an interesting fascination with robots and aliens. Is that still going on?

You know, when you really think about it, they could be among us right now. That's why you want to be careful who you drink with-you never know when these people are gonna rip their faces off.

Is Al Gore a potential alien?

I don't think Al Gore, but Jerry Lewis-I think he was a little scary.

Do you think our new president has any chance of being funny?

Does he have any chance of being taken seriously is the real question! I mean, this guy seems a little bit out of the game. He thinks he's saying one word and he's actually saying another thing-it's pretty classic comedy.

Is there anything that's off limits, that you will not talk about?

When Bill Clinton first came in office, everybody was making fun of Chelsea... I felt like she's just a kid. Everyone is self-conscious when they're 13 years old, you think everyone is looking at you, and this poor kid, she realizes everybody really is looking at her, the whole country is making fun of her.... I didn't really participate in that.

Are there specific individuals or groups that are off limits?

I wouldn't be making fun of some guy in a wheelchair who was at the show. I wouldn't do something like that... unless he started heckling me, and then he's got it coming. I got heckled in Texas by a blind guy. I didn't want to give him a hard time because he's blind already, the poor guy, but after a little while I finally said, "Hey, you know, one more time and you're just another jerk like everybody else."

So what ended up happening?

Ahh, he was drunk, he ended up getting up and going home.

It seems to me that being so drunk that you can't see particularly well is bad enough, but being drunk when you're blind, you know, that's just gotta be a recipe for disaster.

Well, the thing about getting drunk when you're blind is you know you don't have to drive home when you get there.

And if you drink moonshine or something, I guess, and you drink 'till you're blind, you're kind of already set. There's no chance of doing any worse damage.

Now see, these are all examples of jokes that might be questionable if we were on-stage right now.

At what point did you kind of say, "I'm really a professional comic?"

Well, I quit my day job in 1986, and that's the big thing, when you don't have to wait tables or whatever you're doing. Now that doesn't mean that you're rich or that everything is gonna be OK for the rest of your life, but it feels pretty good.

Is there any show you can remember where things didn't go well at all?

I can't think of any specific examples, which is too bad, because that's a good question. I've done shows where we were in the middle of Canada and we had a strip show coming on after us and people were in various stages of paying attention and anxious for the strippers to show up, and so it was rowdy and weird.

But you didn't start stripping yourself?

No. I have never taken my clothes off on-stage.

Okay. I've got a personal question. I went out with this girl who was a stand-up comedian a couple of times, and she wasn't very funny when I talked to her. So I'm curious if you consider yourself to be funny all the time, or if you like, "save it up."

I think that's the thing that people have a perception that comics are funny all the time. I mean, if I was trying to be goofy and silly I would be funnier right now, but it would be annoying. In my show, I'm talking to the audience for 50 minutes to an hour. If you did that in real life, and you just met some people and you didn't let anyone else talk for an hour, you'd be kind of an asshole....

Do you ever see yourself abandoning standup entirely and just doing film?

I don't think I would ever want to quit doing standup. It's such a good job in that you get to write it and you get to perform it and direct it. You can do whatever you want and you have the immediate feedback of the audience. It's hard to beat a job where you get to go on-stage and complain for an hour and have it validated by people laughing at you and your point of view and how stupid everybody else in all the stories is. So you complain for an hour, and then everybody gives you a round of applause and wants to buy you a drink. I mean, that to me is a good job.... It's the opposite of what usually happens when you complain for an hour.

So anyway, I'm looking forward to seeing your show.

Well, I hope you get some people to come out. I mean, live comedy is so much better than seeing it on T.V. You're gonna laugh more times at the average comedy show than the funniest movie you've ever seen. Plus, you get to have cocktails. I mean, assuming that you're 21.