For the last several years, Abercrombie & Fitch has tried to make life a little easier for preppy pretty boy-and-girl hopefuls by marketing rugged "lifestyle" clothing that's sure to turn heads. But if you think it's hard to pull off that sexy A&F look when you're strutting down the quad, you can only begin to imagine what it takes for Abercrombie to make you one of their own "brand representatives." Recess recently got our hands on a top-secret "look book" guide for A&F employees. Let's just say it takes more to get on with A&F than it does to be on a CBS series. With that thought in mind and manual in hand, Recess took a look at how the Survivor cast would
Kelly
Size Zero: Kelly wouldn't be a runner-up in the A&F world. She has the unnaturally waifish look necessary for A&F's teenier sizes. A plus: she also seems a bit catatonic, like an A&F model.
Verdict: Sure thing.
Joel
Fratboy superstar: Brand representative is likely too low a position for Joel. His ripped bod is better fodder for the Abercrombie & Fitch Pornterly... er... Quarterly.
Verdict: Stay naked.
Colleen
She's got the look: Colleen also has modeling potential. She might even be too good for the A&F Quarterly.
Verdict: If Colleen was selling Abercrombie clothes, we'd
Dirk
Improper headwear: "All coverings must be A&F brand hats."
Facial hair: Goatee violates A&F's "no facial hair" rule.
Verdict: He missed the show's final jury; A&F wouldn't hire him, either.
Richard
Facial hair: No beards.
Bigger challenge: A&F employees need to "look great in the Abecrombie-style clothes." Richard didn't call himself a "fat naked fag" for nothing.
Verdict: Not a chance.
Greg
Bad hair day: "For men and women, a neatly combed, attractive, natural, classic hairstyle is acceptable."
Verdict: This mop-head geek would be ineligible for the $5.50/hour job of A&F brand rep.
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