FILM: I Still Know What You Did Last Summer

Jennifer Love Hewitt in a bathing suit on a tropical island. You can't go wrong with that, can you?

Apparently, you can.

Director Danny Cannon and screenwriter Trey Callaway somehow manage to foul up the time-tested recipe of dressing a beautiful woman in skimpy clothing and having her run around witless, and somehow manage to stumble their way through 96 minutes of plotless mayhem and idiotic one-liners.

Two years after Julie James (Hewitt) and her cohorts accidentally killed Ben Willis (Muse Watson) and one year after they purposely killed him, Julie and company hope the third time's the charm as they try to kill him once more.

Julie is spending the summer in school (not Duke this time) when her best friend and roommate Karla Wilson (Brandy Norwood) wins a trip for four to the Bahamas. Hoping to ease Julie's traumatic flashbacks to her traumatic summers, Karla invites her boyfriend Tyrell (Mekhi Phifer), Julie and Will Benson (Matthew Settle) on the trip. Benson is a young stud trying to woo Julie away from fishing aqua-neck Ray Bronson (Freddie Prinze, Jr.), the guy who killed Willis in the original.

In a stunning twist sure to surprise theater-goers everywhere, that pesky psychotic killer shows up on the island, brandishing his trademark fish-hook terror. After killing off a few cheaply-paid, insignificant movie extras, Willis is left alone with our four heroes.

If you're looking to ogle at Hewitt for an hour and a half, this movie serves its purpose with its share of Hewitt breast shots. If you're looking to ogle at Sarah Michelle Gellar, you're out of luck-she died in the original, but don't worry, Buffy the Vampire Slayer is still running on the WB Tuesdays at 8 pm.

However, if you're looking for, say, a plot, acting talent or horror, then you're better off renting Base-ketball. We'd give it an F, but we love Jen way, way too much...