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Kitty babies

(04/23/10 8:00am)

I live with an alien. Her name is Shibby Shibby and she is a shape-shifter. Well, she might be a shape-shifter. Most of the time when I’m watching she looks like a walking shadow with cute-but-creepy yellow eyes. It’s when I’m not watching that she does her shape-shifting. 

In need of a hero

(04/09/10 8:00am)

Sport, that great anachronism. An exhibition of passion and will, a struggle of endurance, a demonstration of teamwork in an age of individualism, all culminating in a championship. The story of the 2009-2010 Duke men’s basketball team was transformed into a heroic epic as the last nerve-wracking seconds ticked away leaving only Duke still standing.

The third wheel

(02/05/10 10:00am)

With an economy in shambles, rising tuition and cramped dorm space, today’s college environment may not be the best in which to raise a baby. But with the apparent degeneration of relationships into a series of drinking games and superfluous conversations, any combination of which leads to someone’s bedroom, the traditional workload normally required to satisfy hormonal urges has significantly lightened over the years. Soon, if the economy continues to struggle, niceties such as beer and vodka may no longer be affordable in the new courting process, and the whole roundabout scheme to achieve physical satisfaction may devolve into one charmingly simple question: “Sex?”

Where legal dreams are made

(12/02/09 11:30am)

The courtroom stirs with anticipation. Lawyers make last minute preparations, witnesses sit anxiously in the front row and then suddenly the judge enters. All rise. For some in the crowd, this may all seem ridiculous. The lawyers aren’t really lawyers; they’re college or high school students. The witnesses are their schoolmates. The case the judge will hear didn’t actually happen. For the next few hours, everyone in the courtroom shares a fantasy involving expert witnesses, emotional defendants and ruthless attorneys.

Forever cold

(11/04/09 10:00am)

On Nov. 9, the Western world will celebrate the fall of the Berlin Wall, the symbolic moment that seemingly captures the subsequent collapse of the Soviet Union and the end of the Cold War all in one physical manifestation. With the end of the Cold War, capitalism and democracy were trumpeted as the best system for all of humanity and the international arena changed forever as the United States held sway over virtually all issues of consequence. The U.S. was declared the victor of the Cold War.

The Israeli missile crisis

(09/16/09 8:00am)

The Prime Minister sits alone in his office, staring out his window as he subconsciously rocks in his brown leather chair. He envisions streets full of rubble, buildings gutted by the explosion, all against the backdrop of nuclear winter. With a stony resolve and a sinking heart, he officially orders the most complex surgical aerial bombardment in human history.

Call of DUTY

(09/02/09 8:00am)

Glute-blasting on the ellipticals, abdominal-cutting on the stability ball, bicep-flexing in the corner mirror—walk into Wilson or Brodie recreation centers any moment of the day, and you’re bound to see many a sweaty mess working themselves into shape.