What does it mean to be successful?

I’ve been asking myself this question a lot lately. As exams pass, semesters roll by and internship applications open and close, the light at the end of the undergraduate tunnel gets closer and closer. And along with it, so does the scary reality of the future beyond Duke.

While I still have a couple of years left before I’m a panicked senior about to fly the coop, the pressure is on to figure it all out before then. What comes next? A job? Medical school? Graduate school? It’s a tough question, especially considering that the answer will likely shape the rest of my life.

In weighing my options, I know that one of my main goals, like those of any other person with ambition, is to be successful. But recently, I’ve been having trouble defining that for myself.

Growing up, I always equated success with money. A successful future would be a financially comfortable one, and a successful career would provide me with the means to live in luxury. Traditionally, that’s how society defines it. Money can provide many things—respect, status, the freedom to travel and the time to pursue hobbies, among other opportunities.

But money cannot buy happiness. And one of my main goals is, of course, to be genuinely passionate about what I do. Here lies my dilemma. Should I choose a path that would be more enjoyable but less financially fulfilling, or one that would be more financially stable but perhaps less exciting?

Sure, it’s easy to say something cliché like “Do what you love, and the money will follow.” “Follow your passion.” “Chase your dreams.” A solid ethical foundation built on childhood Disney movies tells me these are the obvious answers. However, a shaky job market and a rising cost of living sway me towards practicality.

Similar decisions crop up all the time in our lives, but usually, the choices are more cut and dry. No one really enjoys taking all those weed-out pre-requirements for their major, but it has to be done. There are days when all I want to do is curl up in bed with Netflix and ignore all my commitments, but that’s not exactly in my best interests. Realistically, sometimes we have to do things we don’t like in order to accomplish our goals.

It’s not so easy when there is no set goal. There is no definite end result in a successful career—it’s not like earning a degree or organizing an event. The goal of a successful future is thus frustratingly vague. There are many routes I could take that would keep me reasonably happy, yet it’s almost impossible to predict the “best” one. Obviously I wouldn’t do something I had no interest in just to be rich, nor would I choose to do something I loved for free. The ideal balance is somewhere in the middle. So how do we find it?

It’s a little daunting to be in college, standing at the crossroads of so many opportunities. Right now, every possibility is open to us. We can wake up tomorrow and completely change what we want to study—we can pick up an entirely new skill set or recognize a passion we never had before.

But soon enough, we'll have to start closing some doors. That means taking a good hard look at ourselves. At what we want out of life. It can be confusing to find our way when we are bombarded with so many opinions, contradicting each other and all based on different priorities. “Do you really want to be that busy?” “You won’t make any money doing that!”

I’m understanding now that the metrics other people use to measure success are not necessarily my own. Some people do want that life of luxury with a summer house and a private boat. Some aspire to fame and recognition in their field. Others might make family life their most important goal.

“Success” differs from person to person, depending on their principles. In order to make the important decisions, we have to prioritize our values and create our own definitions of success, however they may differ from popular opinion.

Pallavi Shankar is a Trinity sophomore. Her column runs every other Friday.


Discussion

Share and discuss “What does it mean to be successful?” on social media.