10 Years Later: 'No Scrubs'

The Song:  I think this song ushered in a whole new genre of music, which I am going to call “Diss Pop.” T-Boz, Left-Eye and Chili spend a tad over 4 minutes creating the blueprint on how to sell records while humiliating the opposite sex. Before Destiny’s Child complained about their bills, before Justin Timberlake told a certain someone to cry a river and before Katy Perry sacrificed any shot of legitimacy, TLC used the one-two punch of “No Scrubs” and “Unpretty” to sell a whopping 11 million copies of Fanmail (remember people, this was pre-Napster). 

The Hype Williams-directed video is cool in that pseudo-futuristic way. If anything, it definitely proves that Chilli is the most attractive member of the group. Left Eye, of course, looks crazy. But not in that “street cred” way she was probably going for. More like an actual insane person. Her rhyming is not very good and she dates herself terribly with the line “you as clear as DVD on digital TV screens.” All in all, this song passes the Decade Test, because  I still know about 75% of the words.  

The Moment: We all held our breaths for the release of Star Wars: Episode 1--The Phantom Menace. Then, when we exhaled, we used our remaining breath to talk about how truly terrible it was. It’s been 10 years and I still really hate Jar Jar Binks.  At least Natalie Portman got out of that train wreck alive.   

Retrospection: Sadly, “No Scrubs” was one of TLC’s last hits, as Fanmail was the group’s last album of any importance before Left Eye passed away in 2002. It’s hard to say whether “No Scrubs” or “Waterfalls” will go down as the definitive TLC song. That’s a debate for another long-winded blog series. I think all we can say now is that “No Scrubs” is innovative and fun.  Frustrated and jealous pop stars of tomorrow can thank TLC.