Cock-a-doodle-do. We should have known at the sight of the chicken coops next door and the Live Nude Entertainment van parked strategically in front of our house (where it would stay all week) that spring break would be interesting. Ten girls; one house; Key West, Florida. We drove 18 hours to get away from Duke's social scene only to find that our anticipated escape would turn into Duke repositioned in a quaint beach town scenario.
We legitimately tried to meet new guys. We were a force de ass, walking down Duval Street tanned, dressed and prepped for a night of kissing non-Duke boys at the bars. While some smooched on randoms, many conversations with guys turned sour at the mention of one word: Duke. As soon as we mentioned what school we attended, guys got rude. Sample responses:
"You go to Duke? Shouldn't you be at home studying?"
"Duke? Really? Wow, you must be some huge ass nerds then."
At the end of two nights I was perplexed as to why some guys would be so turned off by university geography. Then, a guy friend explained: "Guys like to trick girls to make them hook-up with them. Duke girls are smart and thus harder to trick. Guys don't want to have to work to get you."
If as seniors in college, boys are still going to be so unglued by our academic prowess, I might as well play along. So, in good humor--and by this I mean laughing at the fact that we'll have jobs when we graduate and Neanderthal state school spring break guys won't--I've broken down the elements of spring break into a lesson plan. I figure by this point we're all in serious withdrawal from break and need some fluff to get us through.
Note: The following is loaded with Key West references and inside jokes, so to those who don't quite get it, tough nuggets. To quote the 2001 SAE Lei Party T-Shirts: If you weren't there, we didn't notice.
Economics. Four hours of unlimited drinking for $10. The Rick's Happy Hour was both efficient and a financially sound investment. Combine this with the maximum cover charge of $3 (most places had none at all) and you have a nightlife that maximizes your alcoholic utility. Unlike Duke where you wouldn't dare make an appearance out before 11:30, in Key West by 11 you were drunk and wandering the streets with, "If found, please return to [insert hotel name here]" written on your arm.
Psychology. If anything, spring break provided positive mental health. Guys and girls alike set out on a mission to meet and hit on members of the opposite sex. The shy ones, the insecure ones, the ones with bad game--they all rallied and put themselves out there knowing that after this week, they would never see these people again. There were both failures and successes, but on the whole, we all came back a little bit braver.
Cultural Anthropology. The most interesting incident of spring break was student co-dependency. We left determined not to spend our week with the same boys. And the same went for the guys. But once we got there, we sought one another out. Though we spent a lot of time meeting new people, in the end, we opted to spend our vacation with the ones we sought freedom from.
We would meet up at the beach, call sporadically during the day to check on plans, and without fail, would all end up at Fogarty's (read: Fogarty's is Charlie's set outdoors with palm trees and Christmas lights). Some looked inward to the Duke crowd for romantic concerns though there were throngs of available unknowns out there to hook-up with.
You can write it off as sticking to who and what you know; others think it's a fear of branching out. In my case, this was the first time I truly understood the unique group Duke brings together. We were happier sticking together because many of the students are the quality people we would seek to have in our lives regardless.
Physical Education. Duval Street, about two miles in length, is lined with bars. Each night was spent walking up and down this avenue, singing and dancing. Combine this with walking nearly two miles to the beach each day, and occasional romps in the ocean and you have one physically active vacation.
Marine Biology. Many got back to nature via snorkeling and deep sea fishing adventures. We coasted on the blue waters of the Atlantic, roamed about the coral with Florida's sea life and appreciated the landscape. It was both beautiful and serene. The 40-year-old men repeatedly screaming "Wet t-shirt contest!" at all the college girls while in front of their wives was entertaining as we sailed back to shore.
Performing Arts. Key West is the land of Buffet and every bar and street corner offered a taste of the local talent. Most of the week was spent singing along to the same 15 cover songs (Sweet Home Alabama... roll tide roll!) and enjoying the laid back atmosphere of Margaritaville. However, tucked away in smaller venues was another taste of cultural flare in the form of drag shows. We took our diverse group of girls to the performance and spent an evening whooping it up as the area's best lip sang to Cher, Celine and company. The sad part kicked in when we realized that these males had better female bodies than most of us. Rather than get depressed, we simply threw more dollars on stage and said, "You go girl!"
While I can continue, I've most definitely gone over my word limit. Over those eight days, we all had ridiculous fun and got back to the fundamentals of vacation: rest and relaxation with good friends. Throw in 4,572 uses of the word "awkward", a nine-person shower incident, the revival of "your mom" jokes, 47 out of 50 states found in the license plate game, a 100 percent success rate in Operation All About the Numbers and 12 boxes of Mac & Cheese and you've got spring break. Call us nerds if you want, but damn we had a good time. And I hope you all did too.
Jen Wlach is a Trinity senior. Her column appears every other Wednesday.
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