I have a friend who can give herself an orgasm sitting at a table in a crowded restaurant. Seriously. She's done it on a second date, no less. Another claims that during the best sex of her life she actually lost count of the number of orgasms she had--once she hit double digits.
It's truly a testament to how far women have come sexually (no pun intended). Not many years ago it was thought that women were incapable of orgasm altogether. Orgasms--like most things sexual--fell exclusively within the man's domain. These days, women are not only orgasming, but they're doing it more often and with more skill than most any man around.
How do we as men play catch up? To answer this important question, I turned to Jack Johnston, author of the Audio-CD Male Multiple Orgasm. Of the many techniques I came across scouring the internet, Johnston's seemed most appealing, as he relied on a mix between physical sensations and psychology and breathing. Many other techniques were too extreme--"Grab this, twist that, squeeze hard"--or too mellow--"Stare at yourself in a mirror for two hours, contemplating your raw sexual energy."
Safely tucked away in my room with the roommates asleep, I took the "Curb Your Enthusiasm" DVD out of my laptop, and popped in
Male Multiple Orgasm. Jack Johnston's voice -- simulatenously soothing and yet full of mystery -- beckoned me to embrace the multiple orgasm, and to focus, work hard and pay close attention as he instructed me. For the next 45 minutes, the orgasm guru took me on a wild ride of sexual indulgence and limitless orgiastic pleasure, full of boyish exuberance and intense carnal gratification.
I wish.
Mr. Johnston did put forth a valiant effort, but I just don't think I'm cut-out for his technique. The truth is I don't have the patience--or the immodesty. His method largely involves "valley breathing," a sort of tantric technique in which the sexual energy is expressed through "Huuuuu-uhhhhh" breathing patterns. Apparently I was supposed to spend 30 minutes simply inhaling this way. Using this rather boisterous breathing method, I was to experience orgasms that actually didn't require me to ejaculate or even be erect--something I found strangely discomforting. And when it came time for me to experience "MMO" -- as Jack calls it -- I was told to express myself through a giant "lion-like" roar. As if his frequent "psychological trauma" warnings were not enough, simply hearing Mr. Jonston imitate my supposed wanton roar put me off the CD. I knew it was never going to happen.
Nevertheless, I'm not disappointed in his guide. It's nice to know that it takes that much damn effort to give yourself a multiple orgasm. For me, the "just give me 20 minutes method" will work just fine.
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