Dust off your wrecking balls, rev up your bulldozers and pack your hard hats. We're heading to Cameron Indoor Stadium.
That's right, Crazies, grab your wristbands for Implosion-ville and get your front row seats to see your beloved basketball stadium blasted into a parking lot, one that's sure to save you that long walk to the back of the Blue Zone. Then follow me to Duke's 100th construction sight of the year: The Krzyzewski Dome--25,000 seats strong, with a drool-worthy food court, a blaring sound system and (gasp!) a scoreboard that can actually show you a video replay or two.
Call me blasphemous, tell me I'm out of control, check my blood for Carolina blue. Doesn't matter. I'm headed to an architectural firm tomorrow morning.
I mean, why not? Cameron turns 64 years old this season, collecting more rust and AARP benefits with each 9,314-person sellout, the place's smell growing even funkier and the hot dogs tasting even more disgusting with each Duke win.
Sure, it was the largest indoor arena in the South when Eddie Cameron and Wallace Wade supposedly came up with the original design on the back of a matchbook in 1935. But now it's one of the smallest in the country and its capacity is more than 5,000 seats smaller than the ACC average of 14,321, so I'm throwing out my matchbooks and breaking out the blueprints.
Then my dad would finally be able to come down and see the Blue Devils play a real game (the Blue-White scrimmage on Parents' Weekend is just a tease; Shavlik Randolph can tell you that much). And local fans can cash in the five extra bucks a month they pay to watch Duke on Fox Sports Net to get themselves a ticket, too.
Unless they'd rather pony up four or five grand to be an Iron Duke, that is. The hefty chunk of money that gets you into Cameron goes to athletic scholarships, but why not just build an extra 15,000 seats and make the money there? It'd create a lot more of a hometown atmosphere, not just one full of the Duke alumni who can pay for their season tickets with the same checkbook that slips their kids through the cracks over at the admissions office.
"But what about that Duke loyalty and tradition?"
Well, you'll still be close enough to the opposing players that you'll be able to tell them how many fouls and how few points they have, but now they might actually be able to read it for themselves on the scoreboard without having to crane their necks to be sure. Oh yeah, the K-Dome will have atmosphere; Duke's spirit ain't goin' nowhere.
Last January, the Maryland Terrapins showed the Blue Devils just how intimidating a new stadium can be when 4,000 students in a court-side mountain jeered down to Duke's team from a 35-degree inclined sound tunnel, the Terps taking away our No. 1 ranking faster than Chris Duhon could fall to the ground with the clock running down and the Comcast Center's decibel level skyrocketing.
Hell, we'll show Maryland who's boss and make the new student section have 4,001 seats wrapping around the court, plus a golden throne for Crazy Towel Guy and a silver-lined booster seat for Crazy Towel Girl. And if we can't fill up that many seats, talking Dick Vitale dolls to pack the rafters are on me.
Just imagine the possibilities: Instead of seeing Virginia Coalition on a West Campus quad for the eighth time or watching Ludacris act a fool, you could have the great folks at Campus Council hook you up with the Rolling Stones. Forget Carolina's charging you 90 bucks a head to see Bruce Springsteen a half hour down 15-501. We're talking Woodstock '09 in your own back yard. It's gonna be awesome, baby!
You might miss your cozy little Ludacris concert or jumping up and down next to the privileged few who braved the ice storm and the fog horns to get into the big game, but just think about 25,000 rocking seats watching Luol Deng, Greg Paulus and Shaun Livingston making their way to their second straight national title. And then just a few years later, Mark Walker--that toddler on the Reebok commercials who you just know is bound for Duke--could be taking head coach Steve Wojciechowski's Blue Devils to title No. 6.
But fine, go make Cameron sell out as much as you want. At least it's got air conditioning now. The K-Dome's just food for thought--kind of like that really juicy Cosmic Cantina burrito or fresh Fishmonger's oyster plate that could be waiting for you at the new food court if you'd just let tradition go for a little bit of bulldozing.
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