Finger Lickin' Good

In Comedy Central's Porn 'n' Chicken (showing Sunday at 10 p.m.), students at Yale turn to videotaped sex and poultry in an effort to: a) find themselves and b) screw the administration. In these greasy horndogs' great honor, Recess proposes some clubs that may help you do the same:

Beer 'n' Skydiving: We all know there is no need to go into the many merits of mixing a case of Pabst Blue Ribbon with a 10,000 foot drop.

Keg Toss Golf: Kegs may have vanished from the quad years ago, but what stops us from lifting last night's off-campus party-starter high into the air and chucking it around the Gothic Wonderland? Bryan Center walkway to the Chapel is a Par-14, but watch out for the bunker near Larry Moneta's office. Ah, nevermind, take a penalty stroke and throw it through his window.

Quaaludes Rhetorical Society: There is nothing quite like mixing heavy downers with fiery debate.

Perkins Fight Club: Is it really a study-break if nobody bleeds? How can you regain the focus needed to cram for tomorrow's stats test without beating up your lab partner with a copy of War and Peace in the 18th sub-basement?

Spontaneous Hazing International: As they pour onto West in droves straight off the busses, just pick one, drop him like a Chevy and go to class'Äîtrust us, your day will be much better for having done so.

We would probably join some of the clubs above, but we're too damn busy polluting ourselves with countless buckets of KFC and multiple-angle DVDs.

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