Disillusionment is akin to the feeling of having something in the palm of your hand, only to watch it slowly slip through your fingers.
The men's soccer team became frighteningly familiar with this sensation, as its season turned out to be a long, turbulent roller coaster ride, finishing unranked with a 12-7 record.
1996 started out with a bang for the Blue Devils, as they garnered a No. 1 ranking in early September and tenaciously held on to it for over three weeks.
During their stretch at the top of the polls, the Blue Devils' defense, led by senior Sam Smith and sophomore Evan Whitfield, carried the team. Duke's first six victories of the season, and 10 of its 12 wins overall, were shutouts.
In 1995, on the other hand, it was the Duke attack that carried it to the NCAA championship game. The powerful offense of yesteryear appeared to have vanished in 1996. While senior co-captain Brian Kelly and sophomore midfielder Jay Heaps led the Blue Devils with 16 and 15 goals, respectively, in 1995, Kelly and freshman forward Troy Garner, Duke's leading scorers this year, notched only six goals apiece.
This offensive ineffectiveness eventually caught up with the seemingly invincible Blue Devils. On September 29, they were upset by Maryland. The chinks in their armor exposed, Duke followed this defeat with home losses to North Carolina and Marshall.
Nevertheless, despite these setbacks, the Blue Devils refused to throw in the towel, winning four consecutive games, including two significant Atlantic Coast Conference victories against N.C. State and Wake Forest, within a week in late October.
Just when it looked as if there was still hope for Duke, though, its season took another downturn. Traditional conference rival Virginia trounced the Blue Devils 6-1 in Charlottesville on October 26. Recovering from this rout was a slow, painful process for Duke, as it gave up crucial matches to South Carolina and the College of Charleston at the College of Charleston Tournament the following weekend.
The inconsistency that plagued the Blue Devils showed not only in their record but also in their lack of cohesiveness. Throughout the majority of the season, the 11 men on the field appeared unable to come together and play as one.
"I don't think we played as a team," Heaps said. "We played more like individuals. We won games early in the season, but we didn't feel like a team until the end. When we did, it was a positive, but it took until the ACC Tournament for us to really come together.... We didn't go into each game thinking we had to win. We went in seeing if the other teams would give anything away. We didn't go in with the go-get-it attitude we needed in order to win."
Another significant factor in Duke's downfall was the need to rebuild in mid-season. Riddled with injuries, the squad was forced to infuse its lineup with a plethora of newcomers and to relocate some of its veterans to new positions. For example, sophomore Josh Henderson was moved back from his attacking striker position to the sweeper slot, anchoring the Duke defense. As a result, the season turned into a gradual learning process for the Blue Devils. By the time everyone had adjusted to their new roles, the season was almost over.
"We had to rebuild the team," Duke coach John Rennie said. "We had some injuries, we had some guys not play very well, and we ended up with a very young team. [During the Clemson game in the ACC Tournament,] when Peter Gail scored, we had five freshmen and three sophomores on the field. So I think we've rebuilt the team, and it's very good, but it took us a while to put the pieces together."
At the ACC Tournament, everything finally came back together. Duke won its quarterfinal contest against Clemson, but then lost a heartbreaker to Virginia in the semifinal round. Although the Blue Devils did not bring home a coveted ACC title, they overcame one of their most troublesome obstacles, playing as a unit for perhaps the first time all season.
"We had a lot of potential, but we didn't show that potential until the ACC Tournament," Smith said. "I would have liked to end the season on a better note, but it was a great team. I couldn't ask for better teammates. They had a lot of heart and dedication, and they played as hard as they could. We all gave it everything we had."
The Blue Devils revealed their full potential for the first time during the ACC Tournament, but potential could only take them so far. Receiving an NCAA Tournament bid was Duke's ultimate goal for the season, but without the ACC championship, it remained on the bubble. When the bids were announced, Duke was not on the list.
The decision of the tournament committee came as a rude awakening for the Blue Devils. After playing in the NCAA Tournament for the past four years and coming within one game of a national title last fall, they had strived for-and expected-an NCAA Tournament berth, so the omission was a crushing blow.
"It was a disappointment not to make the NCAA Tournament," Kelly said. "Making the tournament was our goal for the season, and we didn't achieve it.... I don't think anyone at any point in their career would think this outcome was satisfactory, especially here at Duke University, where excellence pervades the whole environment. I definitely would have liked a better conclusion to my senior season and my soccer career."
Their season over, the Blue Devils have nothing left but to reflect and rebuild. In the ACC Tournament, they proved that they have the potential to contend with teams in the upper echelon of college soccer. Now their task is to build from this foundation in the future.
Duke intends to use this year's outcome as a motivation to finish its next season in a better position. In order to prevent a repeat of this year in 1997, the Blue Devils believe that they have to stay mentally prepared for every single game. If they can maintain their concentration throughout an entire season and not give away any easy contests, they should be able to correct this year's mistakes in the future and have a season that more closely resembles 1995 than 1996.
"We have to be completely focused," junior forward Matt Shattuck said. "We can't have mental lapses like we did during the middle of the season, because they'll come back to haunt us."
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