We don't know anyone, really. Our perceptions and ideas of others are often times false, based on snippets of half-listened to conversation, what others might have said about this or that person or what they may have said about themselves but that we misinterpret. We often see others through a lens that is convenient.
What are these assumptions we make based on exactly? Photos and posts seen on social media? An anecdote told or overheard into which we read far too much? Whatever our stories may be of other people, they're often just feeding our delusions or fear, our jealousy or aversion, our greed... you name it.
It seems the most respectful thing we could do for anyone is to engage as if we know absolutely nothing about them and simply allow the interaction to inform what is being revealed in the moment.
People are capable of change, and in fact, we are always changing as we move toward the inevitable, whether we want to acknowledge it or not. To assuage our own feelings of self-worth or to satisfy an insecure need to establish a sense of order, we prefer to put people (including ourselves) in little boxes and label them.
But in truth, all people are both greater and lesser, stronger and weaker than we think. We are a microcosm of the world in its totality. Good and bad, perhaps, but then again, so much more.
Let's respect that and not be presumptuous in thinking we know more than we actually do about anyone. Let's look each other in the face with wonder and a mind that is open to all the possibilities. And when the moment has passed, let it go.
The person you encounter the next time, whether it be your spouse, child, parent, friend or acquaintance, may have grown into someone else altogether, and wouldn't that be a wonderful thing?
Diana Garcia
T ‘94
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