It's Not the Worst That Could Happen...

Miss September, Danny DeVito and a private jet. Thank God it's only rated PG-13.

When they team up in What's the Worst That Could Happen?, DeVito and Martin Lawrence reaffirm that a few one-liners and a couple of entertaining action scenes are more than enough for success at the summer box office. If you're anything like us, you'll appreciate the gay jokes, the blatant mockery of foreign cultures and Lawrence's references to the size of his "pro bono." Then again, you may have class. There's really not much more to this action comedy than that.

Things get rolling when a fly honey named Amber (Carmen Ejogo) goes home with Kevin Caffery (Lawrence), our kleptomaniac star who woos her with his knowledge of precious art. Like us, Kevin does not have much money and he is not too bright--16 plus 6.5 apparently equals 21.5--but he sure has charm. "I couldn't buy you that painting, but I can buy you a cup of coffee," he tells Amber, who gives Kevin much sex and her father's $5 ring after he steals the aforementioned painting and her heart.

At this point, our endearing crook seems to be on his way to a happily-ever-after ending, but that's when he and business partner Berger (John Leguizamo) try to make a hit on the beach house of billionaire Max Fairbanks (DeVito).

As the two robbers catch Max in the act with Miss September, the recently bankrupt business tycoon robs Kevin of his Cracker Jack ring. Max and Kevin begin a rather amusing 90-minute pissing contest, refusing to yield until one can claim dominance--and the worthless piece of finger jewelry.

Along for the wild ride are a few vindictive women, a transgendered detective and a security chief who has the personality of G. Gordon Liddy and the sexual preference of J. Edgar Hoover. All of this kept us mildly entertained while we learned that the rules and the playmates always bend for rich people--even when they look like DeVito.

--By Brody Greenwald and Kevin Lees


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