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Duke is like unprotected sex: You were excited to get in, but sad that you came." I recently overheard that phrase in Bostock, of all places, and burst out laughing, piercing the eerie silence of the reading rooms. But afterwards, I started thinking about the nugget of truth embedded in the comparison.
In some ways, Duke is split into two moral opposites. I got the first clue during my orientation weekend, when I persuaded my hall-mates from Brown to accompany me to the Marketplace party. What a great idea! I mean, what could be wrong with bringing my Southern, conservative, religious friends to a hip-hop party?
I bet that every man reading this column has had those words hurled at him at some point in his life. I remember getting annoyed by them in elementary school. Whenever I got sick, my mom would break out the medicine cabinet, enforce bed-rest and keep bringing me soup or tea. My father couldn't stand to watch such erosion of my masculinity and would inevitably interrupt with something like "Oh come on-be a man! You don't have to lie in bed all day."
It's a problem the administration can't fix, and one that most students don't really understand. I was one of those students until recently-when I realized that the very stereotypes I proudly rejected left me confused about sexual assault.
Try to imagine a world without men. What hopes and-more likely-stereotypes do you use to build such a vision? Surprisingly, scientists are debating the evolutionary chance of male extinction, making such a world a possibility.
I was floored when I read that a survey found 42 percent of men to have faked orgasms. Further research found several recent surveys with statistics around 20 to 25 percent. That number springs to 42 percent, according the U.K. daily The Mirror, when examining the 18 to 34 year-old age group (listen up, Duke girls). You can Google this yourself. Just be careful what you type into the search bar and do not, as I learned the hard way, hit the "I'm feeling lucky" button.
Hope is possibly the most addictive drug in the world because most people desperately need to believe in something. They will hold onto their faith long after they’ve lost everything else. It goes to reason that the fear of losing something so important will motivate people to accept all kinds of fallacies. This is nothing new—such arguments have been made by Freud, Nietzsche and countless others who claimed that people believe what they want to believe.
Exactly a week ago, on the very page that you're looking at right now, there was an incendiary column about religion that seemed to set the whole campus on fire.
A few weekends ago I did something I had never done before--I went to Church. While I was in Church for a very specific occasion, the irony of this unprecedented event started pouring forth the moment I heard the topic of the sermon. This particular Sunday, a week before my departure for spring break in Florida, the preacher just happened to be delivering a sermon that was criticizing hedonism. It simply seemed too predestined, running over with suggestive symbolism and fated irony that goes beyond what could be attributed to mere coincidence, so that consequently I spent much of my break thinking about hedonism.
I'm sure that you have heard countless times that people always want what they can't have. We want things that are hard to get and why wouldn't we since the value of anything is inherently derived from how difficult the item is to obtain.
When I was a freshman in high school I remember watching a movie in one of my classes in which, at one point, the heroine turns to her significant other and says "we are who we are; people don't change." While the movie itself isn't really significant, for whatever reason, that line has always stayed with me. As a teenager and then an adolescent, change is an ever present topic in your life, or maybe the better word would be improvement since nobody conscientiously tries to change for the worse. Just take a moment to think about all the things that you would like to change and improve about yourself whether it be the trivial, such as go to the gym more often, or the profound such as be more open-minded. Whatever the case may be and however long a list you compile, it still begs the same, timeless question--can people really change?
There are a lot of things at Duke that continue to surprise me, but I would have to say that the dating scene in the Gothic Wonderland has been something that has kept me more entertained than anything else. With every new semester, I hear or witness something that I never thought of before. Nonetheless, if you happen to even partially listen to people whine about their relationship problems, it becomes clear that certain trends start to emerge. As diverse as Duke is, it honestly seems that a large number of people here fall under a handful of different categories.
