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Letter: Genuine, thoughtful, brilliant: Friends remember Grey

letter to the editor

Dear Grey,

Like a painter in front of the infinite complexity of a blossoming flower, I’ve been struggling to portray you—but no words can do justice. I knew I would never forget you from the day I met you—debating existentialism on the back of an Uber to Wheels is not what I expected my Friday night to be. The closer I got to you, I realized that people like you are the reason I came to Duke. When I was losing myself in overthinking every detail of my future, you reminded me that love is all that matters. When I doubted myself, you looked at me with such pride and admiration that you made me excited to be myself again. You knew how to pick the right words not because you were trying to impress, but because you were true. Your noble character that honored every word and commitment, your genuineness and brilliant mind is something I want to share with my kids one day when I tell them stories about my years in college. As logical as you were emotional, as witty as you were creative, you remain one of the most deep, complex and strikingly beautiful people I ever met.

I remember you reading me your law school essays. One of them was about a single mother in an immigration center you worked. You told me that to you, her bravery and persistence defined the American spirit and the values of this country—and you inspired me to believe. You could’ve written about yourself, your ambitions or any brilliant idea you had, but you didn’t. Instead, you chose to write about others and what you saw, admired and valued in those around you. You took the time to understand people in all their complexity, accept them for who they were and make friends with those entirely different from you, because you never looked at anything at the surface level. Your kindness, vulnerability and honesty in sharing your thoughts to help others improve are testimonies to the unparalleled depth of your spirit. It makes sense for you to have felt like you did not fit in, because you did not—you were extraordinary.

I’ll never forget the endless hours we spent debating any topic, the enlightenment, awareness and humility you brought to every discussion—and how hungry they left me for your thoughts, perspectives and support. It didn’t matter if it was Sartre’s ideas, fashion, love, friendship. You lifted all of us unconditionally, like the coach who knew when to believe in us or when to push us in a better direction. The most beautiful thing you taught me is that love is all that matters. At this time, I know that carrying your love in our hearts is all we need to carry on and become the people you always believed we would. As your noble soul continues to live in all of us, we take you with us every step of the journey—we will remember you, and we will make you proud.

Thank you for the conversations, the study sessions, the laughters and fun times, the unconditional support, the bright memories, for your remarkable friendship, and your unforgettable spirit. Thank you for listening, challenging and believing in me, for being a blessing to all of us. Thank you for your love.

We love you, Grey, now and always.

Ioana Camui is a Trinity senior.

Editor's note: The Chronicle is accepting letters to the editor remembering Grey and Raj. If you would like to share your thoughts and feelings, please submit letters to  


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