To commemorate this year’s 60-percent-chance-of-rain LDOC, we compiled excerpts from letters written by Duke’s outgoing seniors as they reflect on their time and final year at Duke.
East Campus: “Back in 2012, we studied in Lilly, ate in Marketplace and went to Shooters every Wednesday and Saturday night like good freshmen. You leave East for a couple of years and they’re dealing with injured foxes, pizza boxes in dryers and some kind of Brown urine leak. What happened?”
Dining: “I will fondly remember my meals at Duke’s top-10 dining program—not hard since I only had about 10 unique meals. I have so many good memories with my friends of trying every sandwich, soup and salad on ABP’s menu. I even got around to ordering the chicken caesar salad with every possible lettuce substitute!”
#EffortlessPerfection: “I’ve gotten so good at handling rejection thanks to Duke. In fact, I’m not even sure what success feels like anymore!”
Pre-Med: “I don’t get what the big deal is. Being pre-med is easy. Just live on Central and do all your research on the bat and mold specimens! They even give you free housing when the pipes burst and your room floods.”
Journalism: “When I applied to Duke, I aspired to become a hard-hitting, scoop-finding journalist, but now? I’ve had to be 'inspired' by The Tab, Rival and Chronicle. At this point, Yik Yak has taught me more.”
Old Duke: “Not only did Sean Kingston come to sing my favorite song, Fire Burning, for my senior year, but my freshman dorm actually got set on fire! But seriously, how can you form mosh pits at the Sean Kingston concert? Get it together and try again. (No really, see you at Shooters on Alumni Weekend.)”
Lemur Center: “I was pretty sad when I heard the Lemur Center was going to lose a lot of its funding after my senior year, but then I heard that DSG was going to put thousands of dollars towards sexual pleasure products. Now, I am at peace. #YesDollarsForDildos”
Basketball: “I just wish that Tyus Jones had stayed. One, we might have gotten to the Final Four with him. Two, I got a selfie with every single basketball player except him last year! #TyusComeBack #SaveJahlil”
Larry Moneta: “LMo’s emails were always the best! Of course they were a real emotional roller coaster, rocking to the highs of extended snow day weekends before plummeting to reports of (European) international tragedies.”
Construction: “I think construction really improved my last three years at Duke. For one thing, I set the world record for longest time singing the Bob the Builder theme song under my breath. I’m just glad we got to see all the projects finish before graduation…wait, we only got Krafthouse? Thanks for nothing, #DukeCrane!”
Housing: “Why did I pay for housing this semester? From K-Ville to A-Ville, there were so many free options! Instead I paid thousands to live in Craven?”
Protests: “The Allen Building sit-in taught me a lot: never go without showering, always carry your privilege with you (to check it of course), and watch where you’re going in your Porsche. Another note: never try to host a Faculty Night.”
#DukeEnrage: “I’m glad Duke is such an eco-friendly campus, but I never was able to find a recycling bin labeled EVP!”
Chronicle Editorial Board: “Yeah, I hate those guys.”
In case you couldn’t tell, today’s editorial was a joke! Happy LDOC and congratulations to the Class of 2016!
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