I turned 21 last month. Not gonna lie: It’s great to be legal. I love a cold Yuengling or a drink at the on-campus bar (farewell, fair Dillo). I know alcohol can be a healthy part of social life. But when you look around campus on a weekend or Wednesday night, you see way too many people stumbling off the C-1 and chundering (a.k.a. vomiting in the bushes). We all know about the unbearably high costs of heavy drinking: car crashes that have killed our classmates, situations where sexual assault is more likely, the EMS calls that are routine on Duke’s campus. A friend once said something revealing at a party: “If I wasn’t in college, they’d call me alcoholic. Man, I love college.” He wasn’t making an ironic reference to the Asher Roth song. How does our drinking culture get this messed up?
I would argue that heavy drinking is not unique to Duke, as much as we like to think that Duke is elite and has its own, elite problems. It’s a widespread problem for college students and young people not in college. According to the National Survey of Drug Use and Health, almost exactly half of people 18 to 20 years old drink, and a full 20 percent were “heavy drinkers,” meaning they had five or more drinks on five or more different occasions in the 30 days preceding the survey. Full-time college students are more likely to drink than other 18- to 22-year-olds (63.9 percent vs. 53.5 percent). So we can’t simply blame the Duke administration for the drinking culture—although I do question the harsher enforcement that is driving parties off campus and away from any supervision. Heavy drinking is a broader problem that especially affects college students.
Teenagers need to know how to consume alcohol responsibly before they get to college. But how can they learn? I think our parents can teach us.
Moms and dads take almost two decades to teach their kids how to eat healthy. My mom tirelessly preached the gospel of “everything in moderation” when it comes to desserts. My parents let me have cake and pie for special occasions, but they taught me to have a slice rather than gobble the entire thing. By the last semester of high school, I knew how much was safe to have and why it was bad to have too much. I had experimented a little bit and learned from it: Chocolate pie for breakfast tastes great but feels awful later. As high school graduation approached, I more or less knew how to handle desserts. But not alcohol.
So I convinced my parents to let me have a glass of wine with them at dinner. And then I convinced them to let me have a beer when we grilled on the back porch. And then I convinced my grandmother to pour me a gin and tonic. My parents didn’t want to encourage me to start drinking, but we all knew that college loomed ahead along with its abundant opportunities for consumption. This was the logic: If they treated me as an adult, maybe I would drink like an adult after leaving home. I learned that a single Heineken tastes great without being followed by another six beers and that a mixed drink can be an accompaniment to a conversation rather than the focus of attention. And even if someone is drinking to get drunk, they would be better off knowing their limits and stopping before going too far. Based on my experience, I think that more parents can sow the seeds for a healthier relationship with alcohol.
Why let high school students drink? Abstinence from alcohol is undeniably the safest option. But if 63.9 percent of college students drink, then they must have learned how to drink from someone. Would you rather they learn from a swaggering upperclassman at an off-campus party during orientation week or from their parents? I think parents can teach their children to enjoy alcohol in moderation the same way they teach them to enjoy desserts in moderation. Of course, I respect every family’s very personal decision. A history of alcoholism in the family completely changes the discussion. If parents themselves don’t drink—one of every three drinking-age Americans abstains from alcohol—then of course they won’t teach their kids to drink. But if mom and dad have a Budweiser while watching the game or sip merlot with dinner, I think they can pour a glass for their college-bound high school seniors.
Worried about the law? Yes, the drinking age is 21 in every state. But according to the federal Alcohol Policy Information System, 31 states allow parents to serve their underage children in private residences. These states range across the country and the political spectrum from Texas to Connecticut to my home state of Maryland. (Unfortunately, North Carolina has yet to see the light.) And for the 19 states and the District of Columbia that technically do not allow any underage drinking, I doubt any police officer would barge into a private residence and cart parents to jail for putting an extra wine glass on the table.
Wondering what the academics have to say? Major studies provide some support for family drinking. In 2009, Robert Turrisi, a professor of biobehavioral health at Pennsylvania State University’s College of Health and Human Development, found that “the only significant predictors of teen drinking behaviors in college were gender and parental limit setting.” There was a highly significant correlation between “the number of drinks parents set as a limit during high school” and the quantity and frequency of their teens’ college drinking. When their parents set low limits, college students were more likely to drink responsibly. I think parents can set those limits by letting their children drink modestly at family events.
Turrisi also conducted a randomized experiment with 1,900 rising college freshmen and their parents. Some families were assigned to talk about alcohol consumption, why students drink and alternatives to drinking before the students left for college. The teens who spoke with their parents were significantly less likely to drink dangerously once they got to campus.
So, if you’re a parent whose child is starting college this Fall: If you teach your kids to drink while they’re at home, they might drink more responsibly in college. Drink with them at the dinner table. Set low limits. Talk about your expectations. If you’re a student headed to college, ask your parents how they deal with alcohol. If they’re enjoying a beer, ask them to open one for you.
Andrew Kragie is a Trinity junior. His second summer column will run on June 13.
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