Continuing the annual tradition of soliciting alumni donations, this year’s performance of an “Average Day at Duke” was a smashing success. The alumni committee went above and beyond to organize a Centennial spectacle to remember.
Monday Monday recently sent an anonymous correspondent to infiltrate the DSG Senate in an attempt to retrieve some answers.
Duke announced plans to destroy the running paths along the perimeter of the campus and replace them with a moat. To exit East Campus, students will now be required to leap or swim.
Unlike traditional Marriage Pact tests, the Blue Devil Situationship Match (BDSM) Program involves open-ended questions analyzed by AI to better match you to the perfect non-exclusive, uncommunicative, not-committal partner.
“Some people say K-Ville’s gone soft. But I say the line monitors are harder than ever!”
While most pre-professional societies do not have a residential section, Beta Upsilon Mu members creatively promote residential connections by commandeering a new common room to couch-surf in every week.
Duke students have lived their whole lives being told they are smarter and more interesting than the average person. Opinion columnists dare to challenge this and say: “Untrue! Our opinions are just as boring as everyone else’s.”
After being a staple of dining for Duke students who loved underseasoned chicken for 15 years, Panda Express served its last rice bowl last May, leaving a gaping hole that has been under constant renovation ever since.
The new buses feature state-of-the-art spears positioned at the front and side of the buses to perfectly skewer any cyclist or skateboarder who dares to brave Campus Drive.
If you’re still looking for a last-minute fit, don’t worry: Monday Monday has got you covered. Check out these eight easy costumes sure to wow the deans.
